Its not long now..... Till I see the Big Man Dr Bittar hes the surgeon about a possible date? To have my decomp surgery done. Ive been thinking about it alot as the time has been getting closer and about what questions I want to ask him.
Things like what kind of waiting list do you have?
How long will I be in hospital (about 2 weeks)
What kind of pain medication can you give me as Im alergic to opiates?
Then I have tricky question like
So how many patients have you lost?
How many have lost mobility?
We are talking about suregery invloving both my Brain and my Spine so its a delicate area I mean we dont want the man to have a cold, and sneeze.
Ive aslo done some thinking about the other alternative as well.. yep the big D I mean what would happen if I dont make it? Do I need to start thinking about what kind of funeral I want? What kind of hymns? Where I want my ashes scattered? Its been playing on my mind a bit...
I spoke to a dear old friend yesterday and told her I was scared I said what if?... She said No it wont happen you've been through enough. I dont want that either I dont want to be called up stairs by Heavenly Father saying "thats enough".
Still its something Ive been thinking about, but I dont have alot of time to dwell on it with Uni assignments coming thick and fast bring on the break only a few more weeks to go!